As we reach adulthood, our coping mechanisms become entrenched. Fear, resentment, anger, and hopelessness take over when we are dealing with conflict. The emotions are huge and seemingly uncontrollable. Depressed people frequently find a release from these negative emotions by fighting.
These responses reveal an ongoing hidden anger together with a subsequent inability to manage it. In adulthood the anger becomes aimed at the wrong targets: instead of family members we act out at colleagues, acquaintances, lovers, and partners.
Tragically, when they are more needed than ever, conflict resolution skills disappear and leave us with the raw anger of the past, pushing us to fight, humiliate and break the other’s self-esteem!